The Custom Design Process: Katie & Adam

This is the fourth installment in my series, The Custom Design Process, where I walk through the steps I've gone through with a particular client to come to their final custom designed invitation. I find it so fascinating, once a design is finished and the invitations have been printed and mailed, to go back in my files and look at the very first draft for my client. Because most of my proofing process is digital, I have files saved in my email and on my computer from every single step of the way. Some designs are very close at the first draft, and the final design isn't too far removed, but others start out SO far from how they finish. If you've ever wondered what the process can be like, here you go! Katie & Adam

1. Inquiry- The first step in the process is for the client to reach out and start the conversation about what s/he is looking for in an invitation. Sometimes this includes sharing Pinterest inspiration, color choices, and general feel. And sometimes, it's a big fat "I have NO idea."

Katie had ideas. Lots of them! She was a bride on a mission, and provided me with lots of direction right from the get go. It was so easy to hone in on her style--she sent me links to invitations she was leaning towards, which made me see right away that she wanted something more traditional with a little creative flair. "Nothing boring" is what she said. Their colors would be navy, light green, light blue, and light pink, and their reception was at Alden Castle, a Longwood Events venue in Brookline, MA. She picked out a design from my own collection that was closest to what she wanted, and they had already done a Save the Date that she wanted to match, at least somewhat, in style:


2. First Looks - The next step is for me to start drafting up some samples based on the ideas the couple provided. I generally provide three First Looks.

Katie wanted to play with the iconic chandeliers of Adlen Castle, since they had used an image of a chandelier on their Save the Date. But she also said they might like to use some kind of lace image. The examples she sent me all had a sort of lacy border around them, so I tried to incorporate that in one of the First Looks. The third option used a fine paper with gold and tiny glitter accents in a layered style:

3. Honing in - The next step is for me to create another set of proofs based on elements from the First Looks that the client wants to see more of -- which fonts they like, which layout is best, and which color combination they prefer.

Not surprisingly, they went with the Chandelier design. The image was actually pulled from a photograph from inside Alden Castle, so the chandelier was a perfect match to their venue. Next up was the 2015 Battle of the Fonts. If am slightly font-obsessed, Katie Reynolds was certifiably font-crazy. (I can say that because she knows it's true, and she knows I love her for it!). They didn't love the formal, swirly look of the fonts on the first draft, so I sent over some script options and then some new versions based on their choices. We also swapped out the border to a navy:

When I say Katie was font-crazy, I say it lovingly, but I also mean it. I think she had dreams nightmares about fonts. I won't let the public in on how many emails really went back and forth on the tiniest of font details, but the short story is that we settled on the font from Option Two, with the ampersand from Option Three, with lots of glyph alterations. We also added back in the green border in addition to the blue, and I lightened up the chandelier to make it feel a little more delicate:

Reynolds_Fitz Chandelier_INVITE
Reynolds_Fitz Chandelier_INVITE

3A. The Inserts:Once the design is in place for the main invitation, I move on to the insert cards.

In this case we needed a Reception/Details card and an RSVP, which I actually started before the invitation fonts were settled on. Katie had been very specific about wanting one of the cards to be light lettering on a dark background:


After seeing these first drafts, Katie asked if we could bring in the chandelier, and had the idea to maybe incorporate an image of Alden Castle. I switched up the page orientation, and did a rendering of the castle. Once we sorted out the fonts, those were swapped out as well:

4. The Details - Putting the finishing touches on a design is maybe my favorite part. This is where I hand my design over, so to speak, to the couple, and let them perfect all the details to their taste and their event.

Once the three main pieces were put together, we started playing with different ways to present the whole package. Katie wanted a sash with some kind of square seal with either their names or a monogram, and we added in a green RSVP envelope to add another layer of color. The whole piece was presented in a white envelope with navy liner, with printed addresses on everything. I LOVE how this all came together!

5. The Accessories - For many of my clients, the invitation is just the beginning. As the wedding nears, there are other items that get added to the list -- welcome cards, menus, programs, favor tags, you name it. All these printed items can (and should, if you ask me!) be coordinated with your invitations. And the good news is, once the invitations have been finished, all the hard work and decision making has been done. The other pieces come together much more quickly because the design theme is already in place!


Katie and Adam decided to carry the design through their Rehearsal Dinner Invitation, which was to be held at the Hampshire House, also in Boston. I employed the same techniques I used to manipulate the image of Alden Castle, and switched up the colors to make it feel different but related:

They also added ceremony programs with coordinating fonts and colors:

Photo: The Feds Weddings
Photo: The Feds Weddings

And menus that poked out of the napkins and incorporated the chandeliers that hung over the tables:

Photo: The Feds Weddings
Photo: The Feds Weddings

This invitation, along with many others, is available on my Etsy shop!

Stay tuned for more Custom Design Process posts!

Why Wedding Favors Still Matter and How to Pick Out The Right Ones

In the course of wedding planning, there are bound to be details that fall through the cracks, get left until the last minute, or get forgotten altogether. It is my experience that deciding on wedding favors tends to be one of those last minute tasks. A small number of couples will think of an awesome idea for favors way in the beginning of the planning, but for most, it is an afterthought. In recent years, I've even heard a lot of couples asking "Are favors even worth it? Does anybody care?" My answer is simple: Yes, they matter, and make them count. Your guests will likely have spent a significant chunk of money (travel, clothing, hotel, gift$$) to be at your wedding to celebrate you. The least you can do is give them a little token to show your appreciation. That being said, it doesn't have to cost a lot of money to be thoughtful and special to your guests. Here are my tips on picking out the perfect wedding favors for your wedding: WeddingFavors

Factor it into the budget and plan ahead. Favors can get expensive, but they don't have to be. Once you have your venue and you have some clue of how many guests you might have, you should be able to get a clear picture of a per-person budget for favors. Get this piece into your budget right off the bat, so it doesn't become a surprise expense at the end of planning. Also, the farther out you have your spending limit, the sooner you can start shopping around. The best way to save money on all aspects of your wedding is to start shopping early. If you find an item you want from a store that has holiday sales, you can keep an eye out for when your item gets marked down or wait until you have a coupon, rather than being stuck at the last minute paying full price or not being able to afford it.

Connect it to the theme. My go-to method for coming up with a cute favor is to connect it back to the theme of the wedding, especially when it's off-beat or non-traditional. I designed an invitation earlier this summer for a travel-themed wedding. For their favors, they made mini magnets that featured a tiny map of each guest's hometown or favorite place. So personal, useful and totally fit the theme! Another of my past clients had a champagne-themed invitation, and they gave each guest a mini bottle of champagne at their seat. Rather than just picking something generic like a bag of mints and sticking a monogram on it, try thinking of a favor where the item itself connects to your wedding!

Photo: The Shultzes

Connect it to the venue or location. If your wedding doesn't have a specific theme other than the awesome location and decor, try thinking of something that matches that. If it's on a farm filled with with wildflowers, why not give your guests a packet of wildflower seeds for their own backyard? If your venue specializes in something like honey or baked goods, they probably offer a favor package for weddings. If you have a lot of guests coming from out of town, you could always feature something local. Couples in St Louis love to give their guests Gooey Butter Cake, and a couple I worked with from Martha's Vineyard gave a mug from The Black Dog to every guest. Whether it's perishable or an item that will last a long time, a location-inspired favor will remind them of how much fun they had at your wedding!

Connect it to something you as a couple enjoy. Another fun idea is to give your guests something useful that is inspired by something you love to do together. Love cooking? Give out wooden spoons or a homemade spice mix! Love to camp? Give canteens or pocket flashlights. Love the beach? How about koozies and flip flops? What may seem like a basic gift in theory, could be really cute and thoughtful when tied into your wedding, and it might actually get used!


Pick a "day-of" item that they can take home! I've seen some really great ideas for "double uses" of wedding favors. One idea is to personalize each favor by adding a label or a tag that includes their table seating. By using the favors as escort or place cards, it kills two birds with one stone, and at the end of the night, the favors left behind have your guests' names on them, so the caterer knows who they belong to! I've seen couples give out sunglasses (which look silly but super fun in photos), koozies, custom glassware, or flip flops, all of which can be used at the wedding and then taken home by guests. You could also order paper flowers instead of using a traditional florist, and your guests could take home stems at the end of the night. These ideas all serve double duty, by adding to the fun and decor on your wedding day, but also giving your guests a token to take with them.

If you do the donation thing, make it meaningful. There is an opinion out there that a donation can be a cop-out for wedding favors. While I agree that a couple could easily say they made a donation when they actually didn't, I have more faith in humanity than that. My feeling is that on order to make a donation that is meaningful to your guests, you should donate to a cause or charity that someone (or multiple people) you love has a connection to. Too often, I see couples go the donation route and choose a cause that they feel close to or that they deem important. In my humble opinion, this seems a little self-indulgent for a favor that is supposed to be in honor of your guests. If you do choose to donate to one of your causes, at least attach the card to a piece of chocolate :).

Don't go crazy with personalization. If the item is something useful that your guests might have around for a long time, don't spend all that money putting your photo, monogram and date all over it. A koozie is one thing, but if I get a candle or a reusable bag or a wine stopper, I'm not all that interested in having someone else's wedding details all over it. Your guests will remember where they got it, and will be more likely to keep it and use it without your names printed on it. Make it special on your wedding day by ordering custom tags with a Thank You note and maybe a cutesy saying that ties it all together. That way the tag can be removed and the item will actually get used!

Think: What Would I Do With This? If the answer is, throw it away, then it's a waste of money, and it's not a favor that will matter to your guests. Go the donation route if you're truly stuck, or hire a pro to help you get creative with details like this!

Are you planning a wedding? What are your thoughts on favors? For more inspiration check out my Pinterest board!

A Spring Wedding On A Boat - Lindsay & Lee


Last Spring, I made a large paper bouquet and matching boutonniere for an Etsy client of mine having a "Nautical themed wedding". I featured the flowers on the blog back in May because I just loved how they came out. Well, you know what I love even more? Their adorable wedding ON A BOAT! An intimate setting on a river boat on the Colorado in Southern Texas, captured by Nadine Photography: 11728854_1108434749186726_2629762631484463659_o11731569_1108435275853340_8694566607349263279_o11794075_1108435169186684_3729283538480112766_o 11807287_1108435315853336_2474844656938599923_o

See all the shots on the blog at

And check out the bouquet in the Etsy shop!

The Custom Design Process: Shayna & Kim

This is the third installment in my series, The Custom Design Process, where I walk through the steps I've gone through with a particular client to come to their final custom designed invitation. I find it so fascinating, once a design is finished and the invitations have been printed and mailed, to go back in my files and look at the very first draft for my client. Because most of my proofing process is digital, I have files saved in my email and on my computer from every single step of the way. Some designs are very close at the first draft, and the final design isn't too far removed, but others start out SO far from how they finish. If you've ever wondered what the process can be like, here you go! Shayna & Kim

1. Inquiry- The first step in the process is for the client to reach out and start the conversation about what s/he is looking for in an invitation. Sometimes this includes sharing Pinterest inspiration, color choices, and general feel. And sometimes, it's a big fat "I have NO idea."

Shayna was on the ball with invitations. She contacted me ten months before her wedding, and even before her engagement was officially announced. This girl was excited. She said she wanted her wedding to be "Romantic, Classic but Unique, Rustic, Fun, Energetic". It would be at Sakonnet Vineyard in Little Compton, Rhode Island in June 2015. She gave me a little guidance with colors: "Pastels. Pink, yellow, gray with some bold accents in the pink family." I visited the venue's website, and found gorgeous photos of waterfront countryside and rolling hills.


2. First Looks - The next step is for me to start drafting up some samples based on the ideas the couple provided. I generally provide three First Looks.

I tried to capture the seaside vineyard vibe, bringing in some softness and romance with pastels and pinks. Honestly, I wasn't loving any of them, and had a hard time grasping what Shayna was going for. How do I capture seaside winery (which makes me think of navy and white and burgundy) with her color scheme? I came up with some very rough drafts, mostly with the intention of feeling out her style a little more:

Crowell Banner Mounted Crowell Ombre Mounted Crowell Peony Mounted

3. Honing in - The next step is for me to create another set of proofs based on elements from the First Looks that the client wants to see more of -- which fonts they like, which layout is best, and which color combination they prefer.

Of the three, Shayna liked the peony design the best, but as expected, none of them were very close. She liked the fonts from the peony design, but was looking for more of a watercolor look--she didn't like the crisp edges against the grey, and wanted the whole thing to look softer. So I stayed with a floral theme, and came up with some other options. To take care of the watercolor, I asked my aunt, Susan Farnsworth, if she would take a crack at painting some peonies for the design. I tried one with a white background to brighten it up, and one with a textured grey:

Crowell Floral2 Crowell Peony

We were getting closer in style, but it turned out Shayna jumped the gun on invitations a little too early in her planning (yes, there is a limit to how early you should start!) We let the design sit for almost 4 months, and as Shayna's wedding was drawing near and her wedding details were falling into place, she realized it didn't quite work anymore. In her planning, she had found that her style was actually a little more traditional and preppy, and she asked if we could scratch the original designs, and start over. So, back to step 2 it was!

2. First Looks - The next step is for me to start drafting up some samples based on the ideas the couple provided. I generally provide three First Looks.

She had developed what she called an "obsession" (her words, not mine) with pink and white stripes, so that was a specific request. In general, she wanted the invitations to be more traditional and formal feeling, so I took another shot. I couldn't quite give up on the peonies, so they made a reinvented appearance:

Crowell, Shayna_Border Crowell, Shayna-01 Crowell, Shayna-02

3. Honing in - The next step is for me to create another set of proofs based on elements from the First Looks that the client wants to see more of -- which fonts they like, which layout is best, and which color combination they prefer.

Turns out, Shayna's original instincts were closer that she thought! The peonies were actually still her favorite, but the design was a little too bright and modern, and she wanted to adjust the wording. So, I lightened up the peonies, made it more symmetrical and swapped out the wording:

Crowell, Shayna_Peony

We were getting closer, but Shayna still felt like the font was too modern, and she didn't love that we had lost the green leaves. So, I added in some formal script, got rid of the all-caps, and brought the leaves back in. I also added the option of removing the rectangle in the center, softening it up even more:

Crowell, Shayna Peony_Peony Crowell, Shayna Peony_Peony_No Rectangle

4. The Details - Putting the finishing touches on a design is maybe my favorite part. This is where I hand my design over, so to speak, to the couple, and let them perfect all the details to their taste and their event.

Shayna was ready to lock it in! She loved the version with no rectangle, and after a few drafts of the RSVP and Details card (we tried out those stripes again for a minute) we settled on the final design. The text was printed in dark grey and light pink, and we carried the peonies over into a vertical RSVP card with blush envelope. The invitation was mounted on a blush backing, and a peony-lined envelope brought the whole suite together.

_MG_2085 _MG_2086 _MG_2088 _MG_2090

It was a lot of work to get to the finished product, but I love how it came out! I love a challenge, and honing in on the perfect design for a client who doesn't exactly know what she wants is all part of the fun. It's so rewarding to finally get there and see it all come together!

5. The Accessories - For many of my clients, the invitation is just the beginning. As the wedding nears, there are other items that get added to the list -- welcome cards, menus, programs, favor tags, you name it. All these printed items can (and should, if you ask me!) be coordinated with your invitations. And the good news is, once the invitations have been finished, all the hard work and decision making has been done. The other pieces come together much more quickly because the design theme is already in place!

We designed ceremony programs, a seating chart, and menus with printed names that served as place cards (love that idea!)

122_2015_0619CrowellLambrechts 367_2015_0619CrowellLambrechts368_2015_0619CrowellLambrechts352_2015_0619CrowellLambrechts 349_2015_0619CrowellLambrechts

We did custom stickers for her welcome boxes at the hotel, and we finally brought in those pink stripes on the stickers for their spice jar favors:

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What a gorgeous wedding! The bridesmaids wore bright magenta dresses, there were just-popped peonies everywhere, and Shayna and Kim were glowing. Congratulations to the happy couple, and thank you so, so much for your business! It was a pleasure helping with your big day!

This invitation, along with many others, is available on my Etsy shop!

Stay tuned for more Custom Design Process posts!

Gorgeous Wedding Photography by Michelle Girard

New & Improved Flower & Bouquet Construction!


The Paper Florist has been a segment of my business now for almost 8 months, and in that time I have sold a total of 22 bridal bouquets and 4 large table arrangements. Add to that over 50 corsages and boutonnieres and over 200 loose single stem flowers, and The Paper Florist has brought in 16% of my business' net revenue for 2015. And I should mention that more than half of that revenue was earned in the last month... Happy wedding season! With growth comes opportunity for improvement in my products and efficiency in my building process. I started out making flowers for my own wedding, and I constructed my flowers and bouquets from what I could find. I'd cut a square base from a cardboard box or scrap of cardstock I had lying around, then glue a cube of dry floral foam to one side. Then I'd trim down a paper towel roll and glue it to the other side, stuffed with packing peanuts for stability. This was the skeleton inside every bouquet I made until a month ago:


While I appreciate the idea of reusing and recycling things like paper towel rolls and packing peanuts, it's just not a sustainable business model, at my size. (I ran out of packing peanuts after the third bouquet, and I guess I don't order enough products from companies that still use them! And we don't go through paper towels fast enough..) Not to mention the labor involved with constructing a base like this for every bouquet, on top of the flowers! Once the bouquet was constructed (flowers on short bamboo stems stuck into the floral foam and secured with glue) there was also the finishing touches, like cutting and attaching leaves to cover the base and then gluing and pinning ribbon to the handle so it looked pretty:

_MG_1720To keep my prices reasonable, I had basically left the labor cost of bouquet assembly out of the equation, and was just charging for the flowers that went into it. It would take anywhere from 30-60 minutes per bouquet to assemble, so if I was going to be able to keep growing I'd have to find a more sustainable solution.

So, I did some research and tried out some different materials and methods, and decided on paper-covered wire stems and a new building process (from petal to bouquet) that cuts the assembly time way down. The finished arrangement is much more realistic looking, and the assembly is just like putting a live bouquet together (except its easier because the flowers are now on wire!). As I was pulling together my first bouquet on the new wire stems, it occurred to me that there was a time in my childhood that I thought I wanted to be a florist. It really feels like I am now!

Check out the first order I sent out the door with the new assembly!


_MG_2551 _MG_2563 _MG_2562

The stems also look much more realistic in a clear vase, and are much easier to arrange than the bamboo sticks I used to use. If I get some free time in the next few weeks, I plan to fill my new apartment with some fresh arrangements using these bad boys. I'll definitely share the results here!


Want to order your own? Lots of examples are for sale on the Etsy shop, but the possibilities are endless! Let's chat!

The Ultimate Luxury Wedding Invitation - Think INSIDE the box!

For a while now, I've wanted to delve into the ultra-luxury side of wedding invitations. I don't own a printing press and I'm not about to go out and buy one. So at this time, high-end printing methods are not part of my repertoire. But I can, and do, provide a super-custom design experience with a heavy dose of creativity and personality. I got into this business because I wanted to provide a couple with a reasonably priced, fully custom invitation that feels more like a creative experience than a store-bought product. And whaddya know, I've actually been successful! People want that. So, why do I want to go upscale? Well, in this case, it was just for the fun of it. If I had the budget for it, what would I splurge on? Foil printing? Check. Gorgeous fonts? Check. A mix of fine paper and luxe envelopes? Lots of details like double faced paper and hand calligraphy? Check. An un-boxing experience (literally) that rivals a new Apple product? Definitely.


These days, I rarely take the time to design for an imaginary client, so I really went whole-hog on this one. I started with the box and the Italian paper. I was inspired by a friend of mine who did her own invitations, packaging all the pieces in stacked white envelopes, each slightly smaller than the next, each with it's own card inside. It was like you were opening a collection of secret messages or clues to a treasure hunt. Such a cute idea, I took it a step further and nestled the whole thing inside a BOX. After doing some research, I found that you can literally seal the edges of this bad boy, throw an extra stamp on it (based on weight) and pop it in a mail slot along with your electric bill and it goes through the mail right like that!_MG_2006

_MG_2110 _MG_2119 (1) _MG_2116 _MG_2114 _MG_2126 _MG_2122

The idea of playing around like this, for an imaginary client, is to try out new techniques, but also to add to my portfolio of ideas and inspiration for future real clients. I love a challenge, and it's so fun to be able to try out big ideas like this, even if it's not for a paying customer. Of course, it does also give me a new listing on Etsy and something to blog about! :)

Do I have your wheels turning? Let's work together on your custom project! Complete an inquiry form and we'll chat!

The Custom Design Process: Kira & Willem

This is the second in my new series, The Custom Design Process, where I walk through the steps I've gone through with a particular client to come to their final custom designed invitation. I find it so fascinating, once a design is finished and the invitations have been printed and mailed, to go back in my files and look at the very first draft for my client. Because most of my proofing process is digital, I have files saved in my email and on my computer from every single step of the way. Some designs are very close at the first draft, and the final design isn't too far removed, but others start out SO far from how they finish. If you've ever wondered what the process can be like, here you go! Kira & Willem

1. Inquiry- The first step in the process is for the client to reach out and start the conversation about what s/he is looking for in an invitation. Sometimes this includes sharing Pinterest inspiration, color choices, and general feel. And sometimes, it's a big fat "I have NO idea."

I've known Kira for most of my life, but we only see each other for a week each year, and we spend most of our time in swimsuits and bare feet. While I feel a great connection to Kira and her family (our mothers are like sisters) I wasn't sure what kind of style she'd go with for her wedding. So, I asked all the normal questions, and while she gave me a little guidance, the general response was "Work your magic!". She said they were having a backyard wedding, with greys and purples and a casual, international feel.

2. First Looks - The next step is for me to start drafting up some samples based on the ideas the couple provided. I generally provide three First Looks.

I tried to hone in on the backyard feel. Fresh flowers, strings of lights, etc. The first two designs were to be a layered flat card:

GaNun_Kira Floral Mounted GaNun_Kira Lights Mounted

The third design played with the idea of travel a little more, and I found this perfect quote that totally fit Kira and Will (and the fact that they had traveled together all over the world and were getting married at her parents' home!)

GaNun_Folder Enclosure Outside

GaNun_Folder Enclosure

3. Honing in - The next step is for me to create another set of proofs based on elements from the First Looks that the client wants to see more of -- which fonts they like, which layout is best, and which color combination they prefer.

Not surprisingly, Kira, Will and their parents all loved the map design. Kira wanted to try out using the fonts from the Light String invitation, and she wanted to see a little more purple. In general, she wanted a more casual, whimsical look. We weren't sure about the grey, but I said I'd send them a few physical samples, and maybe we'd lighten it up with the envelope. In round two, I brought back the lanterns for a minute just to see if they liked that theme in the map enclosure:

GaNun_Folder Enclosure Lights GaNun_Folder Enclosure Swirl

4. The Details - Putting the finishing touches on a design is maybe my favorite part. This is where I hand my design over, so to speak, to the couple, and let them perfect all the details to their taste and their event.

They ended up sticking with the heart design, and we switched to a vertical layered card for the RSVP to bring in some more purple. The online RSVP added convenience and dropped the cost a little, and I set them up with their own URL. The sash on the front was switched up for a purple band with a little of the map peaking out as a second layer. Fun fact: I was very careful to make the heart cut-out (yes, that was cut out of every single invitation!) over Scotland, where Kira's entire family went on vacation recently, and where Kira and Will share many fond memories.

_MG_2063 _MG_2066 _MG_2067_MG_2070

5. The Accessories - For many of my clients, the invitation is just the beginning. As the wedding nears, there are other items that get added to the list -- welcome cards, menus, programs, favor tags, you name it. All these printed items can (and should, if you ask me!) be coordinated with your invitations. And the good news is, once the invitations have been finished, all the hard work and decision making has been done. The other pieces come together much more quickly because the design theme is already in place!

Turns out, Kira and Will have a plethora of talented friends, and Kira's pretty crafty herself. I was lucky enough to attend this wedding myself, and it was gorgeous, super comfortable and homey, and so personal. They carried the travel theme throughout the whole backyard, with a world map seating chart, and tables named after some of their favorite places in the world. We sat in London!


One of Kira's friends drew portraits of the bride and groom and the whole bridal party. Definitely one of the coolest ceremony programs I've ever seen!

11061275_10100196212914579_3349086340278405520_oPhoto Credit: Melissa Mullins11713723_10100196214676049_6454582835795878915_oPhoto Credit: Melissa MullinsPhoto Credit: Melissa MullinsPhoto Credit: Melissa Mullins11700687_10100196221517339_7951828998221277186_oPhoto Credit: Melissa MullinsWill's Dad gave a toast at the wedding, and pulled out the invitation, bringing the whole experience full circle for everyone there. "Life brings you to unexpected places, Love brings you home." I got chills (and teary-eyed) and was reminded for the thousandth time why I love what I do!

This invitation, along with many others, is available on my Etsy shop!

Stay tuned for more Custom Design Process posts!

Wedding Photography by Melissa Mullins

The Complete Guide to Wedding Invitation Etiquette in the Modern World (or, how to plan a wedding without offending anyone)

Gift Faux Pas-01
Gift Faux Pas-01

It's 2015. Chivalry is dead, good manners aren't important, and "proper" etiquette for weddings has completely gone by the wayside.

Wrong. All three of these are lies young people tell themselves to get away with bad behavior. I could go on for a whole post about chivalry and manners, but that's for someone else's blog. I'm here to talk weddings, and as far as I'm concerned, we're in the middle of an etiquette crisis.

Now, if you know me at all (or have worked with me, read my blog or browsed my gallery) this might sound out of character. I'm not some traditionalist---far from it in fact. I'm all about fun, unique weddings. And I love to create work that fits an out-of-the-box couple and their funky style. But, I am also quick to advise my clients (when asked) on modern etiquette. Things have certainly changed since your parents got married. I've met my fair share of wedding planners with their noses stuck up high in the air, and their taste and etiquette stuck back in the 70s. If you ask these types, they'll tell you none of the old etiquette rules have gone out the window, but I disagree. Modern times call for modern brides (and grooms). So the question is, what has changed? I sometimes feel like we are in such a different world -- technology-driven, fast-paced, accessible-everywhere -- that it's hard to distinguish where to draw the line. What "rules" are considered old-fashioned, and what rules can be broken or adjusted to fit with the times? And possibly most important, what rules shouldn't be broken and what traditions shouldn't we be changing?

So, here's our simple guide for current etiquette and some tips on how to navigate the complicated world of wedding invitations (and more):

is it appropriate?
katie's advice
Should we send traditional, formal invitations?
  • Appropriate for a formal, traditional wedding in a church or other formal venue.
  • Formal wording on the main invitation makes it clear that it will be a traditional ceremony with an upscale reception.
  • Skip the super formal invitation if your wedding is more non-traditional or outdoor with casual decor and attire. You don't want to run the risk of "over-selling" the formality of your wedding and making it look shabby compared to the invitation.
  • Formal does not have to mean "old-fashioned". Formal invitations usually have simple layouts with more traditional wording, but even formal invites are incorporating more and more color and design that add some flair.
  • Most of the verbiage decisions are based on who is hosting and how you want it announced. There are lots of modern options that are still considered formal without sounding old-fashioned.
  • Upscale printing methods like letterpress or gold foil and pretty packaging in folder enclosures with lined envelopes make your invitations feel more formal while not being too stuffy!
  • Address the invitations to Mr./Mrs./Miss
Can we send a more casual invitation?
  • Perfect for a barn or backyard wedding or for a non-traditional venue like a museum or urban space.
  • Casual, cheeky wording is great for a casual, cute, personalized wedding, but doesn't match bow ties and ball gowns. Make it a formal invitation for a black tie or semi-formal wedding.
  • Connect the invitation design to your relationship, your passions, and the things that will make your wedding memorable and SO YOU. **This is my wheelhouse. I'd love to work with you!!**
  • Feel free to break the rules when it comes to wording and style! Get your guests excited to celebrate the two of you and dance the night away!
  • Address the envelopes in a way that matches the style and verbiage of the invitation (maybe drop the Mr. and Mrs.)
Can we send online invitations?
  • In short, No. (you're on the wrong blog!)
  • The invitation sets the tone of the wedding, and if you want your guests to take it seriously, you should too!
  • No idea.
Do we have to send a Save the Date?
  • In short, no. But you should consider it if you want a lot of people to come. The more notice your invited guests have, the better chance they'll be able to make it.
  • For a short engagement (less than 6 months) an early invitation is best. No need to overwhelm your guests with lots of mailings, and it's a cost saver to do just one.
  • Send the Save the Date as soon as you've nailed down the major vendors and made your deposits (in other words, when you can't change your mind!)
  • The more time your guests have, the better!
  • It does not need to have a photo--no need for an expensive photo shoot! There is a lot you can do without a photo, just ask me!
Is there a specific time invitations should be sent out?
  • Every wedding website will tell you something different, so just do the math for yourself and figure out what makes sense for your guest list deadlines (work bakwards)
  • If you've sent a Save the Date, the majority of your guests will have it on their calendar and already know whether they're coming or not. It's truly a formality these days.
  • If you haven't sent a Save the Date or are having an especially short engagement, give your guests at least 2 months.
  • For a destination wedding, you're on a completely different timeline. Ignore all traditional wedding timelines and ask me!
  • Start with the catering or venue deadline for your guest count. This can be 1-3 weeks before your wedding.
  • Give yourself a full week between the RSVP deadline and the deadline for your caterer/venue. You will have to track down the stragglers and you want a good window of time for people to get back to you, etc.
  • If you are planning a lot of personalized or expensive favors or per-person items that require a guest count, give yourself an extra week.
  • Give your guests 3-4 weeks to RSVP.
  • Add up all that time and that's your "hit the mailbox" date
  • Add a week to that for the invites to go through the mail, and that's when you send them!
  • The window is basically 6-10 weeks out, and I always say the earlier the better!
Can we accept RSVPs online?
  • Appropriate for all weddings nowadays.
  • Feels Non-Traditional and Modern
  • Green Option
  • Easier for Guests
  • Cost Savings
  • Choose a wedding website that includes online RSVP
  • Match the wording style to your invitation
  • Hire KEEvents to help plan your wedding and it's included!
Who should get a +1?
  • Appropriate for married couples or couples that live together
  • Make your own policy for all guests getting a +1. (i.e. All guests get to bring a date, or Only guests who have a serious significant other, or No one you haven't met at the wedding)
  • Don't hand-pick which guests get to bring a date. A clear policy is best for not hurting feelings.
  • Be prepared for some difficult conversations and be united in your responses!
  • If you are inviting a date for a guest with a significant other, both names should be on the invitation.
  • If you are inviting dates for all guests (i.e. some you do not know personally) add "and Guest" to the invitations of the dates you do not know.
  • If dates are not included, only the guest name goes on the invitation.
  • If you're worried, you can make it clear on the RSVP by writing in the guest name or by writing (1) or (2) guests somewhere on there.
Should we invite kids? Which ones?
  • Weddings are traditionally adult-only events, but modern weddings can be full of children. It's completely up to the couple.
  • Flower Girl/Ring Bearer Only is an acceptable option.
  • Go all or nothing. If there are some children invited but not others, those without their children there will wonder why theirs were not included.
  • Don't invite children to the ceremony only. This is actually more of a hassle for parents, and the kids feel left out of the party, which is more fun!
  • Keep in mind some caterers will not offer a kids' price.
  • The names on the envelope of the invitation indicate who is invited.
  • To make it extra clear, you can make a polite note on the RSVP card that your wedding either includes children or is "respectfully an adults-only event".
  • Ask close family and friends ahead of time if children being included is a "deal-breaker"
  • Consider hiring a babysitter, and be aware that including children will likely mean extra planning to keep them occupied and happy.
  • If your guests are bringing their young children, they will likely leave early. If you have a lot in this situation, your wedding might empty out early!
Can we put our registry on our invitation?
  • It does not belong on your wedding invitation or in any other prominent location.
  • Only OK to do on your wedding website, or on a shower invitation sent by someone hosting a shower.
  • It is not a requirement for your guests to give you a gift.
  • Mentioning it on the website is a convenience to your guests.
  • Create a tab or link on your wedding website.
  • You could say something like "Your presence at our wedding is a gift in itself, but if you feel inclined to give us something tangible, we have created a wish list here:"
  • Avoid anything sounding mandatory.
  • Do not say anything about your preference for gifts or really anything else.
Can we ask for money?
  • Never.
  • It is completely inappropriate to ask for money of any kind, or to specify who to write checks out to.
  • If you'd prefer money to put towards a large purchase, tell your parents or someone else close to you whom people might ask.
  • When you do receive money, deposit checks as soon as possible, and make sure you let your guests know what you plan to put it towards when you THANK them.
Can I throw my own shower?
  • Don't do it. It's basically the same as putting your registry on your invitation.
  • It doesn't really matter who hosts the shower, as long as it's not the couple getting married.
  • The invitation should be sent by the host in honor of the couple.
  • Since the invitation is not coming from the couple, the registry and gift information can be included here.
  • The host should also collect the RSVPs.
  • The only part the couple could play is in deciding who to invite if asked.
Can we have a couples' or co-ed shower?
  • Definitely appropriate in 2015, in most situations.
  • It's no longer appropriate or politically correct to assume gifts for the home (cooking utensils, iron, vacuum, linens) are only for the bride.
  • Lets not forget our same sex couples--would you only have a shower for one of the brides? And what about two grooms? They should totally have a shower!
  • Showers don't have to be all tea and cucumber sandwiches.. get creative and make it a party!
  • Couples showers can be co-ed cocktail parties or backyard bbqs.
  • Think outside the box, and share with your partner in receiving gifts for your new life together!
Should we send a shower invitation to everyone invited to the wedding?
  • Unnecessary.
  • Inviting more people = Getting more gifts. You don't want to seem like you have the gimmies.
  • The more people come, the longer the whole event drags on, and the more gifts your guests have to sit there and watch you open. Keep it intimate.
  • Start with your bridal party and family, and then if you feel like there are some people you consider to be your closest friends that should be included, add them to the list.
  • Sometimes there are games and activities planned that will expose some of your secrets and unknown details of your relationship. If there's anyone you wouldn't want to hear those things, don't invite them!
Can I get away with a cash bar?
  • This is only appropriate if you or the hosts of the wedding have a strong aversion to drinking heavily.
  • It's like inviting someone to your house for a dinner party (which is essentially what a wedding is, on a larger scale) and asking your guests to pay you for their glass of wine.
  • Understandable if you don't want to have a party full of drunks, but don't be surprised to annoy a few people if you go this route.
  • If you do choose to have a cash bar, you should let your guests know ahead of time, probably on their invitation.
  • Most people these days expect some sort of open bar, and many women don't even bring a wallet, never mind actual cash.
  •  If they're told ahead of time, they'll be prepared with cash and won't be as disappointed or annoyed when they're asked to buy their drinks.
Do I have to hand-write my Thank You notes?
  • Always handwritten, never typed. (Unless you are disabled and can't write.)
  • You do not have a year to send them out, nor do you want to take a year to do it.
  • Ideally, you get them out in three months, and six months is the maximum.
  • If you hit the six month mark you should make note of how long it's been and how you've been using the gift in the months since it was received.
  • A Thank You note should always mention the gift. Nothing generic.
  • Create a logging system as you receive gifts so you don't forget who gave you what.
  • Do not write "thank you for the gift" and leave it at that. The note should be personal, and not something that could have been copied to everyone at your wedding.
  • Weddings are expensive, the gift was probably expensive, and you want your guest to know their personal presence at your wedding as well as the gift were greatly appreciated.
Someone suggested I have my guests write their address on an envelope at the wedding and shower so I don't have to write them all out when I send Thank Yous.
  • I'm not a fan of this.
  • It's not clever; it feels lazy and impersonal.
  • Don't make your thank you note seem like just another box to check off of your wedding to-do list--your guest put some thought into their gift, so make your Thank You note heartfelt.
  • Keep an up-to-date address list and hand write your notes AND envelopes.
  • Get a stamp for your return address to make it easier or get your return address professionally printed.
  • If there are any mistakes or new addresses, they'll come back to you and you'll know you need a new address. (Another reason to get them out early!)

It's your wedding, so by all means do what you'd like. Don't agree with my take on things? Let me know in the comments! I'm all about friendly discussion. :) I'm here to offer advice and share my expertise in the field. And to tell you that in this modern world, being a considerate person and thinking of how your guests will react to your choices is still important. Most people don't mean to be rude or offensive when they make their wedding plans, but most people also would rather not offend anyone if they have the choice. So, you can thank me in advance for maintaining the respect of all your friends and family throughout this process!

All-White Bridal Bouquet - Featured in Anna Pearl's Curiosities!

A couple of months ago, my aunt asked me if I would like to put some of my paper flowers in the front window of her shop. My Aunt Sharon owns a vintage shop on Main Street in Niantic, Connecticut that's just too cute for words. If you're ever in the neighborhood (or driving on I-95 and need a break) definitely stop in and check out Anna Pearl's Curiosities. There is something for everyone, and Sharon is brilliant at finding one of a kind antiques and vintage treasures. The shop window faces Main Street, and for the spring months she installed a wedding-inspired display; vintage jewelry, accessories, veils and even a vintage dress. She thought a bouquet would be a perfect addition, and would give my business some extra exposure (can you tell she's super supportive of me??).

Anna Pearls 2

She suggested an all-white bridal bouquet, to match the white and ivory pieces in the window, and I agreed it was the best option for something that would be appealing to most brides. I was going to include my most popular flowers--roses, calla lilies, hydrangeas and a couple of peonies. But as I got going on the assembly of the bouquet with the mix of ivory and white, I was loving how it looked with just roses and hydrangeas, so I kept it simple:


The bouquet is finished with ivory satin ribbon and pearl accents, and as always is lightweight, durable, and won't wilt in the summer heat! With some basic care and dusting, it'll last forever--no expensive preservation needed!


I'm in the process of making a second bouquet that will be more "hands on" for customers so you can feel how lightweight they really are and see the flowers up close and personal. But in the meantime, I think this one looks great in the shop window!

Anna Pearls 3Anna Pearls 1

The listing for the all-white Rose and Hydrangea paper bouquet is live on the Etsy shop, but as always it's just a sample of what you can order. I love working with custom colors and special requests.

And if you're in the Niantic area, go visit my Aunt Sharon and tell her Katie sent you! [googlemaps!1m18!1m12!1m3!1d2996.330514154921!2d-72.1942835!3d41.323425799999995!2m3!1f0!2f0!3f0!3m2!1i1024!2i768!4f13.1!3m3!1m2!1s0x89e6108950899ef7%3A0xdcb3f8fe31e1f1f8!2s281+Main+St%2C+Niantic%2C+CT+06357!5e0!3m2!1sen!2sus!4v1433793439665&w=600&h=450]

3 Simple Rules to Follow for the Best Wedding Ever: PART THREE

Back in April, I started a mini-series on the blog highlighting Three Simple Rules for the Best Wedding Ever. Part One was the 2 Week Rule: Make a timeline for your planning that ends 2 WEEKS before your wedding. And stick to it. A couple of weeks ago I gave you Part Two: Focus on how you want your wedding to feel, not how you want it to look.Check out Part One and Two, and meet me back here! The final rule for planning the Best Wedding Ever is PART THREE:

Make a pact to stay by each other's side all night long.

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This one is the simplest of the three rules, but possibly the most important. In keeping with my Parts One and Two, here are a few points to focus on:

1. Why? Well, this is an easy one. It's your wedding! The two of you! The room will be full of all your favorite people in the world, but you just chose to marry each other and this day is all about your love. You worked together for months planning this day, and you deserve to bask in the glory of that together; to share the day with the other person that it's all about. One of my close friends gave me this advice before my wedding, and it is the single best piece of advice I can pass on.

2. It's more difficult than you think! Staying by your new spouse's side may sound like a no-brainer, but it's actually a challenge to stay on each other's hip all night. Just think -- you are the center of attention, everyone in the room wants to talk to you, dance with you, take a picture with you, and make sure you have a drink in your hand. If you're standing next to each other and two people come up to you at the same time and split you apart, it's very easy to get pulled into the crowd, onto the dance floor, and all of sudden lose track of each other. It can be a challenge to make it back across the room without seeing someone you haven't seen yet, or getting pulled into another photo with friends, so it's not always easy to get back to each others' sides. Before you know it, a precious hour has gone by without a kiss! If you agree before the wedding starts that "where you go, I go" you will avoid long stretches apart.

3. If you follow some traditions, you haven't seen much of each other before the wedding. In many cases, couples spend the last few days before the wedding participating in guys-only/girls-only events and appointments. Many couples see each other at the rehearsal and dinner the night before and then stay apart until they have a first look or walk down the aisle. So you might actually feel like you miss each other by the time the wedding starts! Don't forget--you are each other's date! Treat it like a date to the best party you've ever been to, and it feels much more natural to stay together all night.

4. Take a moment alone. You've probably heard it before, but time flies by so quickly on your wedding day. You've thought about the details of the day for months, you've practiced your vows and your dancing for weeks, and now it's here. Take a few minutes at some point in the evening to step outside, just the two of you, and have a moment to soak it all in. It's worth a few minutes of the night to have some privacy away from your families and the cameras and just be.

5. Greet people together. It's a challenge, but make sure you say hello and thank you to all the guests at your wedding. The best way to do this is together. Some of the guests from your spouse's family you may be meeting for the first time, and you don't want to have to introduce yourself at your own wedding. People are there to see the two of you, and they love to see the bride and groom together, take a photo and congratulate you.

6. Don't do the cigar thing. This one might be a battle you don't want to have, but please hear me out. I've been to many, many weddings where at some point in the evening, whether formal or casual, there are cigars offered outside. Typically, the groom and a large group of guys head outside and gather for a cigar. Sounds like a fun celebratory tradition, right? Well, guess what happens inside? The party dies. All of a sudden, you're missing 25 men from the dance floor, and it feels like the party is over. And the worst part? It lasts at least 30 minutes! I could go on and on about how I think this is the biggest party-killer out there, but I am listing it here because it also means, unless the couple is both having a cigar, you are apart for 30 minutes or more and (he) comes back smelling like an ashtray. I politely told my husband I really didn't want to do the whole cigar thing at our wedding, and he agreed. The dance floor was packed all night, and as far as I know, no one missed the smoke break.

Obviously there will be moments you will have to step away from one another (ahem, bathroom break) but if you both have it in your heads from the start that you are going to try to be together for the entire night, it will happen for the most part. I have worked with couples who have said their biggest regret from their wedding was that they felt like they barely saw their new spouse. On the other hand, the couples I have met who have followed this simple rule (myself included) were so grateful for the advice. Every memory I have from our wedding night includes my new husband standing or sitting right next to me, and that's a beautiful thing.

So, what do you think of my Three Rules? Try following them yourself and let me know how it worked for you! I sincerely believe these are simple, straightforward ways to make your wedding awesome and completely enjoyable for you and your guests. Good luck and happy planning!

3 Simple Rules to Follow for the Best Wedding Ever: PART TWO: Focus on the Feel

A few weeks ago, I started a mini-series on the blog highlighting my top three tips for the Best Wedding Ever. Part One was the 2 Week Rule: Make a timeline for your planning that ends 2 WEEKS before your wedding. And stick to it. Definitely read that one first! Today I give you Part Two: Focus on how you want your wedding to feel, not how you want it to look. 

Seated Couple

As with Part One of this series, there are a few subcategories to this rule:

1. Don't impulse buy your wedding venue. Wedding planning should start at "30,000 feet" and should always start with the season and the venue. Which season? Indoor or Outdoor? Formal or casual? How big will it be? Before you even start looking at venues, a consensus should be met between the couple and whoever is paying for the wedding on these basic elements. Then you can hone in on where you want to start looking. Once the search for a venue (and with it, the date) begins, you have a baseline to judge your choices. Does this ballroom fit the style and feel we agreed on? We wanted a rustic, romantic wedding with 80 people... OK, no? Let's move on. There are SO many venues out there to choose from, it can be overwhelming when you start looking. It is also really, really easy to swoon over a gorgeous wedding venue when you walk in, and even talk yourself into the extra cash it will take to pay for it because the wow factor is blinding you. Next thing you know your rustic romantic wedding for 80 has turned into a 200-guest black tie affair, just because you fell in love with the look of a venue. The way to avoid impulse buying when you're venue shopping is to always come back to those basics of what you agreed you wanted for the feel. Does this fit US?

Photo Credit: Nikki Cole Photography

2. Think about how you want your guests to experience your event. Yes, your wedding is all about you. But it's really not. If you wanted to just get married, you could go elope somewhere and skip all this rigmarole. You chose to have a wedding because you wanted to throw a party, and a party is ALL about the guests. If your guests are having a fantastic time, your party will be fantastic. This is the part where it helps to have been to a few (hundred) weddings as a guest, which won't happen if you're the first to get married (that's when you hire someone like me!). If you're lucky enough to have attended even a couple of weddings, you probably have a memory of some really great and really not so great moments as a guest, so start with those.

When it comes to guests' experience, I'm a firm believer that the general timeline and layout make all the difference in the world. This is an area that tends to get overlooked, so hear me out. As your timeline for your wedding day is starting to take shape, stop and mentally walk through your day as a guest for a moment. Is there awkward downtime between the ceremony and reception? What will your guests do during this time? (And don't say "that's not my problem", because it most certainly is). How far are your guests travelling? Where will they park? When will they get to say hello to you? How long will they be seated for dinner? Who will they be seated with and why? Every decision you make for the structure of your event should be viewed through the eyes of your guests, based on how you want them to feel. The nicest and most memorable weddings I've attended had one thing in common -- a great flow to the event, and a feeling that I was looked after. More often than not, your guests have gone to some lengths, financially and otherwise, to be at your wedding. When your guests feel like their comfort and happiness has been taken into consideration, they are much better partiers!

3. Let your agreed upon "feel" guide your decision making. There are SO many decisions to be made when you're planning an event like a wedding, and it's easy to head down a rabbit hole with decorations and formalities that takes you far, far away from your original inspiration. The easiest way to make sure every detail fits together and creates the vibe you're going for is to come back to that original conversation you had at 30,000 feet. We said we wanted a rustic, romantic, small wedding. Does the drapery and uplighting really go with that? Should we even do a bouquet toss? There is no formula for the perfect wedding, and there's no rule book for what you "have" to include. I find a lot of weddings end up feeling cookie-cutter (or worse, an over-done mess) when the bride and groom just go ahead and include all the American wedding traditions even when they don't fit the feel they were going for, or they don't fit the couple. You may fall in love with a table setting in a magazine with crystal glassware, a giant floral centerpiece and tons of candles, all in your color scheme. But if you wanted a more laid-back feel for your event, this table isn't right for you. It's beautiful, just not for your wedding.


4. It's a wedding, not a photo shoot. Photos are important, don't get me wrong. They help you remember and relive your wedding day for the rest of your life. But if you're planning a wedding, think for a second about how many decisions you've made (timing, decorations, formalities) because of photo opportunities. I have been a bridesmaid and a wedding planner for so many weddings that just feel like a day-long photo shoot. It's miserable, and the whole day ends up having a slight air of falseness to it... Like all of this is just for show, for the cameras. Do yourself a favor and find a journalistic-style photographer who excels at candids and story-telling. You'll get amazing photos without feeling like you're posing all day. And the photos will tell the true story of your wedding, not a contrived story that your photographer posed for you. You want to be there, in the moment, all day long. You want to feel real emotion and let the day happen as it will without breaking up the flow of events just to take pictures at every corner. Trust me on this one--find a photographer that will work in this way, and you will not regret it.

When you're the guest of honor at your own wedding, it doesn't really matter how the room looks, plain and simple. You'll be on cloud nine, and if your main focus of your planning was on the feel of the event, you will be immersed in the setting, and feel as wonderful as you dreamed you would. You will not regret spending extra time thinking through logistics and making careful, personal choices for your wedding day. These are the things that really make a wedding feel special, even if they aren't as much fun to plan as centerpieces and dresses.

Nautical Paper Bouquet & Boutonniere - Peonies & Roses in Ivory & Coral

_MG_1836A few weeks ago, an Etsy customer wrote me a message asking for a bouquet for her nautical themed wedding. She wanted a large bouquet in whites and coral tones, with a mix of flower varietals. She also asked for a coordinating boutonniere. We went with peonies and roses, and I think the peonies add some more dimension to the bouquet. She asked for a navy and white striped stem wrap, so I did an ivory satin base with a thinner navy grosgrain spiraling around. The pearl accents and rope detail really complete the nautical, preppy look!_MG_1844

One of my favorite tips to give couples when they're planning a big wedding reception is to reuse the flowers from the ceremony at the reception. Flowers tend to be one of the most expensive elements of decor, and if you can move alter arrangements and pew decor to the reception venue and use them as centerpieces or to fill out your accessory tables, you'll save a lot of money. So frequently when I'm coordinating a wedding, I'll ask the bride if she has a plan for the flowers and bouquets after the ceremony, and she looks at me like I have ten heads. My bouquets are sized to fit really nicely in a short vase, mason jar, or even just a pretty glass (shown below). This is also a great way to display your paper bouquet after the wedding! Your bridesmaids (and you) don't want to carry around bouquets all night, and if you lay them down on a table, there's a greater possibility of them getting damaged (especially if they're real flowers) or getting lost by the end of the night. If you plan to use the bouquets as decoration at the reception, you and your girls will know exactly where to find them at the end of the night, and they're much more likely to stay in good condition!


_MG_1842 _MG_1845

The listing is live on the Etsy shop! As always, the flowers shown in the shop and on the blog are just examples of what we can do. If you have something in mind that you don't see here or in the shop, just ask! The possibilities with different color and flower combinations are endless!

Colors Flowers

The Custom Design Process: Jen & Andy

_MG_1989This is the first in what will be a series of posts that will take you through my custom design process for wedding invitations. I find it so fascinating, once a design is finished and the invitations have been printed and mailed, to go back in my files and look at the very first draft for my client. Because most of my proofing process is digital, I have files saved in my email and on my computer from every single step of the way. Some designs are very close at the first draft, and the final design isn't too far removed, but others start out SO far from how they finish. If you've ever wondered what the process can be like, here you go! Jen & Andy

I featured Jen & Andy's wedding invitation back in January when I wrote about my favorite invitations from 2014, but I didn't go into too much detail about the process. Here goes!

1. Inquiry- The first step in the process is for the client to reach out and start the conversation about what s/he is looking for in an invitation. Sometimes this includes sharing Pinterest inspiration, color choices, and general feel. And sometimes, it's a big fat "I have NO idea."

Jen and I have known each other our whole lives, and she was getting married at the vacation spot where we met. It's a beautiful lakeside setting in New Hampshire, at a family camp that's been there for almost 100 years. To start, Jen said, "when I look for inspiration on Pinterest i tend to go with pictures associated with words like gypsy, modern hippie, boho". She told me her colors would be grays with pops of red. She also said she trusted me to come up with something...

2. First Looks - The next step is for me to start drafting up some samples based on the ideas the couple provided. I generally provide three First Looks.

For Jen and Andy, I created three drafts of a Save the Date to start. This was going to be a destination wedding for their friends and family, and the original plan was to send out a Save the Date way ahead of time that would include lodging information, etc. and follow with a formal invitation later. Jen said she liked the pine trees, and liked the whimsical script font, but was picturing a brighter red. She also said they had just had engagement photos taken (by Heather Fairley Photography in Denver). They were hoping to use a shot or two for the invites, so I waited a few weeks to see those before the second round of drafts went out.

3. Honing in - The next step is for me to create another set of proofs based on elements from the First Looks that the client wants to see more of -- which fonts they like, which layout is best, and which color combination they prefer.

In this case, I received a folder of gorgeous engagement photos and a totally new idea started to form. Jen and Andy are musicians and music lovers, and this photo in particular really spoke to me:


An idea started to form around the idea of a record cover, and as I started to piece together the format and design, I realized this was going to be best seen in person, rather than a digital mock-up. And since Jen was a friend, I decided to surprise her with the design. The plans had changed a bit, and this invitation was going to include a lot of information. After gathering all the details from Jen, I got the draft finished, printed and assembled and sent it along in the mail, just telling her to keep an eye out!

GaNun Cover 2_MG_0618

It was designed to look like a record case - A folded card, with a pocket on the inside to hold the necessary insert cards and a printed record background. I used the original whimsical script Jen had liked, vamped up the red a bit, and made the whole thing a little more urban-feeling to reflect their Denver rockstar lifestyle. A few days after it hit the mail, I heard the good news: They loved it!

4. The Details - Putting the finishing touches on a design is maybe my favorite part. This is where I hand my design over, so to speak, to the couple, and let them perfect all the details to their taste and their event.

Jen asked to change text on the front from "Diamond Collection" to "Love at 45 RPMS", and we swapped out the photo for one where they were both looking at the camera. I love that Andy's guitar made it onto the cover, and that the color of Jen's shirt plays off the red in the invitation. Jen added her parents' names to the front, and it was good to go! (Aren't they gorgeous?)GaNun Cover Cropped

To finish off the theme (I love a good theme) I made the RSVP look like a concert ticket, and Jen asked for a tape deck card for song requests. I also added a little record symbol with their initials on the back cover--I love these little details! They chose a cement deep-flap envelope, on which I printed their guest addresses in coordinating fonts to tie the whole suite together.

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5. The Accessories - For many of my clients, the invitation is just the beginning. As the wedding nears, there are other items that get added to the list -- welcome cards, menus, programs, favor tags, you name it. All these printed items can (and should, if you ask me!) be coordinated with your invitations. And the good news is, once the invitations have been finished, all the hard work and decision making has been done. The other pieces come together much more quickly because the design theme is already in place!

Because Jen & Andy's wedding was a destination and the invitations went out so far in advance, they had some more information they wanted to relay to their guests closer to the date and prior to their New Hampshire arrival. When the time came for the "second send-out", as we were calling it, Jen sent along the information she wanted to include and asked if I had any ideas. I thought it might be fun to package the information as a brochure -- the invitation had hinted at a music festival kind of vibe, so I thought it would be cute to play off that idea. Plus, we got to use more of their awesome photos!

_MG_1983[1] _MG_1988[1] _MG_1986[1]

Since Jen & Andy's wedding, I added their invitation to my Etsy shop, and I've had quite a few custom orders. The finished product is always different depending on the couple and their personal choices. Here are a few that show how different this design can look:

Peck Cover Torres Ivory Cover 1 Drumgold Cover

This invitation, along with many others, is available on my Etsy shop!

Stay tuned for more Custom Design Process posts!

3 Simple Rules to Follow for the Best Wedding Ever: PART ONE - The 2 Week Rule

 This weekend was all weddings for me. It kicked off Thursday night with a rehearsal and rehearsal dinner for a wedding I was coordinating Saturday. At the dinner I was seated with an engaged couple, and the groom-to-be (go figure!) was picking my brain about the best advice I could give them for wedding planning. Friday night I had dinner and drinks with a friend getting married in a month who told me I gave her a few simple tips that have made a world of difference for her during the planning process. Then last night, I coordinated (and thus attended) my first wedding of the season, refreshing my bank of advice and renewing my ideas and energy for all things wedding! All of this had me thinking -- If I had to give someone my Top 3 Tips as they were starting to plan their big day, what would I say? Well, after a wedding-themed weekend and some thinking, I've come up with 3 simple rules. If you follow them, you will thank me! This week is PART ONE: The 2-Week Rule.

(Part TWO can be found here)

Make a timeline for your planning that ends 2 WEEKS before your wedding. And stick to it. K&A WEDDING

There are some subcategories to this rule:

1. Wait, I need a timeline for the wedding day AND a timeline for planning the wedding day? YES, YES, YES. You have how many months to plan your wedding? 6? 11? 17? You can't just dive in and assume it'll all get done without a plan. That's how couples end up sleep deprived and "over it" by the time their wedding rolls around. Make a giant list of all the pieces, big and small, that need to fall into place, and make sure it's a "working list" -- I recommend using Excel, so you can easily reschedule as you add projects and appointments. Everything from picking out a venue and finding a dress to printing programs and getting your nails done should go on there. Nothing should be overlooked, because believe it or not it's the little tiny things (like remembering to wrap your bridesmaid gifts and write a thank you note to the minister) that keep the couple up until all hours the week of the wedding. There are lots of resources online you can start with, and we here at Katherine Elizabeth Events are working on our own planning tool we hope to roll out later this year. Planning for the planning is SO key to a stress-free engagement.

Photo credit: Krista A. Jones

2. Especially if you are DIY-ing or on a tight budget, pick out the design and materials for your projects early. (Programs, menus, table numbers, place cards, favors, welcome hotel bags, etc.) What do I mean by this? If you want to make your own programs and menus, go pick out the paper and embellishments 2 months ahead even if you aren't ready to print yet. That way you can shop around for exactly what you want (or work with a designer on the perfect custom design) and have all the decisions made and materials ready when the ceremony and catering details are ironed out. I can't tell you how many brides and their mothers walk into Paper Source (where I've worked part time for the last year) the WEEK OF THEIR WEDDING looking for paper for programs and menus. You do NOT want to be doing this the week of your wedding. Before you say, "but I don't know how many guests I'll have!" I'll tell you honestly--you can end up spending more money waiting until the last minute getting the exact amount you need than you will if you buy more than you might need at the best price 2 months ahead of time.

Better yet, hire someone like me to take care of your paper pieces, and I'll make sure you're well ahead of schedule! (Try to contact me at least one-two months out!)


3. Work backwards from 2 weeks before your wedding, not your wedding day, when setting an RSVP deadline. As I just mentioned, it's true--a lot of these details (favors, programs, welcome hotel bags) can't be firmed up until you have a final guest count. If your RSVP deadline is only 2-3 weeks before your wedding (as many websites say it should be) that gives you one week to collect the stragglers (THERE ARE ALWAYS STRAGGLERS) and then the two weeks before your wedding to get all that stuff done with your final numbers. In addition to buying a rough estimate of materials way ahead of time, I also recommend setting an RSVP deadline one month to 5 weeks out from your wedding. The reality is, with the exception of a handful of people, most of your guests will know if they're coming or not. Why put more last minute pressure on yourself?

4. Make time during these two weeks to cultivate the marriage you're about to enter. Planning to be "done" early leaves you time to go on a date. Sounds ridiculous if you haven't been there, but it's SO important to think about. The week of the wedding, my fiance and I built in a night for just us -- we went out to dinner and didn't talk about the wedding. We shared a fantastic meal at a restaurant we had been dying to try, and basked in the excitement of what was to come with all of our family and friends coming into town to celebrate our love. If we hadn't planned for our planning to be done 2 weeks out, we wouldn't have been able to fit this in.

So why do you want to be "done" 2 weeks for the big day? Well, mostly because you won't be. No matter how well you plan, there are always last minute details you didn't think of. If you plan to fill those two weeks with construction and assembly of welcome bags and favors and programs, the un-planned stuff will add a ton of stress. Also, if you finish all your wedding related projects two weeks out, you get a little more "out of your head" with all of it. Giving yourself a little break between the planning and the actual wedding is AWESOME. If you're going, going, going, right up until the rehearsal, you don't have any time to decompress and separate yourself from it before it actually happens. I've heard so many brides say that they felt like they didn't really "take it all in". This is the secret to doing that--you have to separate the planning from the experience of the day. If you think of your wedding starting the Monday before it actually happens, and force yourself to finish projects before then, you will enjoy all of it SO. MUCH. MORE.

And here's the real meat of this piece of advice that no one thinks of until they're a bride: all these extra last minute details take up precious time that should be spent on things like beauty sleep and the day-to-day aspects of your life you don't think about (like doing laundry and cleaning your house and working out and eating well). You want to be and feel your best on your wedding day, and in the days leading up to it. That means taking care of yourself!

All of this advice comes from personal experience, both in seeing what last minute projects do to brides' stress levels, and in feeling what not adding last-minute stress felt like when I was a bride. For the most part,  I was done with my wedding projects two weeks out. My bridesmaids commented on how I was so relaxed, and this is the number one reason why. My wedding was long distance so my hands were slightly tied with having a few projects lined up for the week of the wedding when we arrived in town. But, the week before that, we had time to focus on ourselves, our home and the marriage we were about to enter into. We worked out every day, ate well, and I had time to clean my apartment, top to bottom. I cleaned out closets, I dusted and vacuumed, I tidied up in a way I hadn't done in months (because let's be honest--wedding planning is top priority for most nights and weekends). Returning home from our wedding to a fresh, tidy home was AMAZING. It felt like a fresh start, and it was the perfect start to married life.

Check out PART TWO of this series: Focus on the Feel, not the Look of Your Wedding

A surprisingly gorgeous bouquet: Black roses for a wedding?

_MG_1772 A couple of months ago, an Etsy shopper sent me a custom request for a bouquet similar to the ones I made for my bridesmaids in my own wedding, which I have listed in my shop. The bouquets I made for my girls consisted of two dozen paper roses in ivory, paper bag and cement, with one personalized flower I printed with the name of each bridesmaid:


Nyana, my Etsy customer, requested similar bouquets in a "mini" size -- just 6 inches around -- with the addition of black! I wasn't sure what to picture, and definitely had my doubts about black flowers at a wedding, but I am sort of obsessed with how these turned out! I love the size for the bridal party, and the black is SO elegant! Nyana requested "Nyana <3 Miguel" printed on a single rose in each bouquet, which I think is pretty adorable.

I loved these so much I added them to my shop. The flowers listed in my shop are mostly examples of what I can do, and are meant to serve as inspiration, and as samples of different color combinations for custom requests. I can visualize color really well (probably why I'm decent at this!) but I know a lot of people need to see to believe. Since even I doubted the black flowers, I had to take some photos for proof of how elegant they are!


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Nyana's wedding is just a few weeks away, so stay tuned for some photos of the big day!

What out-of-the-box color combination would you love to see? Order today!


Katherine Elizabeth Events

The Best Kind of Winter Blues: Roses and Calla Lily Bouquet


_MG_1715 I'm not about to whine about the winter in St. Louis, don't worry. We cannot hold a candle (or a snow shovel?) to the winter they're having up where I'm from in Boston. But, most US cities have experienced some pretty frigid temperatures lately, and St. Louis is certainly among them. As I sit here bundled up inside with a solid winter head cold, it's a brisk "feels like" 8 degrees outside with occasional flurries, and temps are expected to drop to around zero overnight. Lovely.

Luckily, this time of year is what we in the biz like to call "crunch time". (The Breakup reference? Anyone?) Seriously, I'm BUSY. Like, I-forgot-to-brush-my-hair-today kind of busy. Which is amazing for so many reasons that deserve another post entirely. Being swamped with work in the depths of winter means I'm never at a loss for things to do while I'm stuck inside for hours at a time. And for me, that means opportunities to be creative every day, and more and more often it means stepping away from my computer screen to spend time working with my hands on my floral collection. I am so grateful to have made this huge change in my life a year ago--there is nothing like spending the day making a beautiful paper bouquet of flowers to fight off the winter blues.

Check out my most recent bouquet that shipped out this week. I love the color combination! I also did a matching boutonniere, but forgot to snap a pic before it shipped out. Carolyn's wedding isn't until the end of April, but her flowers are already delivered and ready to go!

_MG_1718_MG_1714 _MG_1720I loved this bouquet so much, I listed it as another sample on the Etsy shop!

Need flowers for your wedding or your dining room table? Have you considered paper? Contact me to place your order!

Choosing the Perfect Wedding Photographer: Advice from a wedding planner and recent bride

EganFam2014-0110 My post this week was inspired by Photography by Nikki Cole's new website, which features a photo of Anthony and me on the front page! It's a beautiful image from our "first look" on our wedding day. Looking at that photo, and clicking through her gorgeous new site made me realize how grateful I am to have chosen such a fantastic photographer for my own wedding. Having seen and heard many horror stories working in this industry, I got to thinking--what if I hadn't been so lucky? I thought I'd share some of the best advice I have for the brides and grooms out there losing sleep over how to search for, choose and afford their dream photographer.

1. Prioritize your Budget (and research locally!). 

This is some general wedding budget advice that you've probably heard before, but it's very important when looking into wedding photography. How important is this? should be a question you ask yourself about all of the major big-ticket items in your wedding budget. Although everyone in the wedding industry wants you to think otherwise, you don't have to do anything. The choices you make are yours to make--don't let venue managers, invitation designers and catering companies pigeon-hole you into a bill that includes things you don't care about. Prioritize based on what is most important to you, and also to those paying for your wedding.

Once you've prioritized your "must-haves" and your "kinda-must-haves", you need to figure out how much everything on your list costs to effectively write a budget. There are lots of online budgeting tools out there, but I've found them to be generally inaccurate since the cost of a wedding completely differs from state to state, region to region. A wedding photography package in Boston can be as much as twice the cost of a comparable size and quality package in Ohio. You can't make decisions about your spending up front without making some calls and doing some research on local photographers.

2. Be smart about packages and payment plans.

Most photographers set up packages that include a limited number of hours, one or two photographers, digital copies of your photos, web hosting for a given amount of time, printed photos and/or albums for your families, and some throw in "free" engagement sessions. Some photographers aren't quick to offer a la carte packages, so it seems like this is the only way they price their services. And an engagement session is never truly free--it's almost always built into the pricing somewhere! If a standard package includes anything you don't want, most honest photographers will negotiate a package that is tailored just for you so you don't pay for what you don't need.

Every photographer will have a payment plan involving a deposit and then one or multiple payments before your big day. While I don't recommend trying to negotiate the final price (read #3 below), I do recommend being honest with your photographer if their payment plan isn't ideal for your financial situation. Many, many of these men and women own their own businesses and have some wiggle room if you want to stretch your total bill out into smaller payments or work with you as you juggle payments due from other vendors. If they want your business, they will work with you--just get everything in writing. If they refuse to budge on payment terms, maybe they're not the right photographer for you.

3. Don't hire your friend's cousin to save money.

So by now you've done your research and come to the conclusion that good wedding photography isn't cheap. So is there another option? Once, I heard of a bride who "had a friend whose cousin said he'd do it for $150" and she was blown away by his professionalism and his work. She was his jumping off point, and two years later he was doing weddings for $4K and is an award winning wedding photographer. Ok, I've actually NEVER hear of that happening. But to answer the question... Yes, there is another option: Bad wedding photography. In the form of unreliable communication, unprofessional demeanor, untimely delivery, underwhelming results. Yes, there are very talented photographers out there who are itching to get into the business, and there are plenty of brides willing to risk it to give them a shot and save some money. But being a good wedding photographer is different from just being a good photographer--there are tight schedules, traditions, nuances and bitchy bridesmaids to deal with that only experience will get you through. If you're feeling inclined to give a newbie a chance, I recommend only using him/her as a secondary shooter. Hire (and pay) a professional for the bulk of your images. Then you can offer for your friend's cousin to come for free and give her a meal in exchange for the images. It's a fair trade for that photographer to build her portfolio and for you to get free images.

The long and the short of it is that good photography is expensive. You're not hiring someone to come take pics on their iPhone and email them to you Monday morning. The skill, experience, practice and equipment required to create these beautiful, lasting images come at a cost, and that cost is worth it. You truly get what you pay for in this segment of the industry. Don't cut corners.

4. Find a portfolio you absolutely LOVE.

Photographers are constantly refining their websites and online galleries to reflect their most recent and favorite work. They curate their collection carefully so it shows not just the range of their work, but also their overall style. If you love one particular image from a photographer, but the overall collection doesn't evoke the style of story-telling you'd like, it's probably not the right fit. You can ask a photographer for specific shots, but it's their instinct and eye for capturing the unexpected moments of your day that will likely lead to your favorite images. If you find a photographer whose portfolio you love, chances are you'll love the work they do for you.

So with so many photographers and styles out there, how do you know what you like and want? Start by envisioning what you will do with your collection. Do you plan to hang them on your walls? Put them in a physical album? Will they live on for eternity only in the digital world? (Stop right here if this is the case, and hire your friend's cousin. This is lame.)

Once you have an idea of why you want these photos, think about how you want them to look and what story you want them to tell. Is your Pinterest full of cute bridal party poses you want to duplicate? Are you obsessed with the faded vintage trend ? Do you want a journalistic-style collection that tells the story of your day? The best photographer for you is the one that shares your style and specializes in producing the collection you're looking for. Figuring out the tone and style you want first will help you sort through the hundreds of portfolios out there to hone in on your ideal photographer. From there, it's a matter of availability, personality and cost.

5. Make sure you like your photographer as a person.

Availability, personality and cost? I cannot stress this enough, since I know many people don't take these words to heart. Your photographer will be by your side all day long on one of the most important days of your life. You don't want to sacrifice the enjoyment of your day for some great photos. Read reviews, meet in person, and hire her for an engagement shoot before you sign on the dotted line. I have met some nasty, crazy (read: egocentric) photographers out there that create beautiful work but add stress and headaches to the big day. This is the last thing you want. You want someone who will keep you genuinely smiling and feeling wonderful, who will stay on schedule and get all the shots you asked for, along with the best ones you didn't expect. Sound too good to be true? It's not, but you do have to do your research and possibly talk to a lot of people!

6. Don't wait until you've chosen a wedding date to start looking for your photographer.

The wedding industry is a fast-moving machine and like real estate, sometimes you have to commit fast or you lose your vendor to another couple. If you wait until you have your venue and date to start looking at bands, photographers, and caterers, you'll be dead-set on the date and may be stuck with no availability for your other favorite vendors. The venue is by far your biggest decision, but the other big-ticket pieces are equally important. Start poking around online and send in some inquiries regarding price, packages and even availability before your date is set in stone. If you have already narrowed down your favorite photographers that fit into your budget, the process is much smoother and faster (and you're more likely to get who you want!) once the date is set. Also, if your venue has two dates available and your dream photographer is only available for one of them, it can help with date choice!

Everything you need to know about Wedding Hashtags (6 DOs and DON'Ts)


It seems as though, these days, every wedding incorporates some form of modern technology in the planning and execution of the big day; from wedding websites and online RSVPs to self-service photo booths and crowd-sourced videos. One trend that's gaining major ground is the wedding hashtag; a simple, FREE tool (which is hard to come by in the big wide world of weddings) that makes it easy to collect social media content related to and posted from your wedding. Hashtags can get out of hand... #weddings #newblogpost #writingonaplane #gopatriots #justgotabloodymary. When people use them in this way it's really just to be cute, and defeats much of the purpose of a hashtag (#imguiltyofthis). If you work in the social media world, you know the point of a hashtag: to "tag" posts, tweets and photos relevant to a topic or brand with the intention of making that content searchable by that tag. When I searched #doyourjob yesterday, I got a huge stream of Patriots fan photos; food prep for Super Bowl parties, pets dressed in Brady jerseys, and even a life-size stuffed Patriot mascot laying next to a dude in bed. Just what I was hoping for.

So, tagging all the social media posts (your friend's selfie on the plane headed to your big day, the video of your walk down the aisle, the photo of all your college friends hungover at brunch the next day) is an awesome idea, right? You've hired a photographer to take the pretty, posed shots, but there's something about those less than perfect snaps that you want to collect and save. With a wedding hashtag, days, weeks, months, years(?) down the road you can search for your tag on your favorite social media platform and it's like reliving your day all over again through the eyes of your geusts (I do this probably once a week with mine--there are over 100 photos!) Are you sold? As you're starting to think about your wedding hashtag, here are some tips:

1. DO create a unique hashtag. Create a unique hashtag. Create a unique hashtag. Create a unique hashtag. I literally feel like I cannot say this enough. And by unique, I don't necessarily mean clever or cute. I just mean UNIQUE. Like, no one else will use this hashtag, possibly ever. It seems like a no-brainer to me, but I am constantly seeing couples choosing generic hashtags that aren't going to get them to that end-goal of being able to collect just their wedding content. Just yesterday, I saw a couple using #MattandAshley. Do you know a couple named Matt and Ashley? Chances are, you'll meet at least one in your life if you haven't already. Go to Instagram right now and search #mattandashley. The photo collection is all over the place; from at least 5 different weddings and about 17 different couples named Matt and Ashley (including a few tweens, which is just awkward.) If the whole purpose of a hashtag was to be able to easily search and find photos and posts from their family and friends at their wedding, Matt and Ashley missed the mark. Unless your name is super unique (like my friends #kiraandwillem), I'd stay away from anything that's simply your names, even if it includes any form of "wedding" or "2015". Even if you don't see it in a search today, there's bound to be a duplicate out there eventually if you keep it that generic. It's only January, but come June every weekend your social media feed will be packed with tagged wedding photos, and chances are, yet another "Matt and Ashley" will be tying the knot. There are lots of ways to make your hashtag unique to your wedding. Adding at least one of your last names is a great first step, or referencing the location or the date. If you're feeling creative, try to think of a pun or a play on your names combined. The most important thing is to search for your hashtag and make sure it's not already out there. My hope is that as more people learn about this trend, a sort of etiquette will evolve and there will be fewer duplicates. But to be on the safe side, make it unique to you!

2. DON'T make it too complicated. Before you go too crazy coming up with a unique and clever hashtag, keep in mind that you want it to be memorable and easy to both read and type. Choosing something like #mattandashleyweddingcapecod2015 may make your hashtag unique, but it's also sort of obnoxious. It doesn't even fit on one line on Instagram and takes up 32 of your precious 140 characters on Twitter! And don't do an anagram like #MAATTK (Matt And Ashley Tie The Knot) because that's just silly, and not in a good way. Try to keep it short, sweet and simple. Options like #CotterCapeWedding, #CapeCodCotters, #AshleyTakesCotter or #CotterMcKnaught2015 would all be great options for the "Matt Cotter and Ashley McKnaught" wedding. (Adding the year is a good idea if your names are more common, since you only have one year's worth of weddings to compete with.) If at least one of your first or last names is uncommon, you can definitely get away with something as simple as a combination of your names, adding the date or year as security. My maiden name (Egan) is very common, but my groom's name (Rotio) is not, so we were able to get away with simply #eganrotio. The chance that another Rotio is going to marry an Egan in this lifetime are pretty slim.

3. DON'T pressure yourself to come up with something clever. The fact of the matter is, not all names are created equal when it comes to wedding puns. If one of your last names is Nott, Wring, or Glover, you have some cute options (#AmyandNickTietheNott, #HePutAWringOnIt, #thegLOVErs2015). But if it's Egan or Scizewski, you're going to have a hard time making a cute wedding pun (although for my Bachelorette we did use #LastRodeoBeforeRotio which was genius). At the end of the day, it's just a tool, and you want your guests to use it. It's not going to have any effect on the amazingness of your wedding. Just pick one that works and move on. There are WAY more important things to be creative about (like signature cocktails and day-of stationery!).

4. DO make sure you let your guests know what you've picked! These days, many young wedding guests who use social media hashtags will ask around to see if there is an "official" hashtag before they post any content. If there isn't one that's been publicized, they'll make up their own (may times leading to the #mattandashley predicament). If you want a successful hashtag, it should be clearly communicated to your guests. If you make it a point to ask your guests to use a hashtag, this will also encourage people who don't normally tag their posts to tag the ones from your weekend, making your collection bigger and better. Including the hashtag on your wedding stationery is a great way to let your guests know. It could go at the bottom of an informal ceremony program, on a welcome note for hotel guests or on a small sign on the bar or the guestbook table. You can even create a #hashtag tutorial like the one we included in our welcome note to our guests:


The older generations don't always understand these new-fangled technologies, and it's nice to include them instead of just assuming they won't be a part of it because they don't understand. No one wants to ask, but they want to know!

5. DON'T go overboard. Remember, this is a wedding, not a marketing event. Don't get me wrong--I love a well-branded wedding. But putting your hashtag on everything from coasters to koozies to table menus is tacky. And the more you push it on your guests, the more you run the risk of shifting your guests' focus from their real life experience of your wedding to their sharing of it on social media. You don't want to look around at your wedding and see everyone on their phones.

6. DON'T live-tweet your own wedding. Ok, so I don't actually think anyone out there is live-tweeting their wedding, but seriously.. for the love of all things Holy, do NOT have your phone on you! You have surrounded yourself with plenty of people who will keep an eye on the time, the details, and making sure everyone shows up when and where they should. This is your day. Take the rare opportunity to be phone-free and soak it all in. Believe me, there will be plenty of photos and videos taken by your family and friends. Leave it up to everyone else!

Have you seen any cute wedding hashtags lately? What are you planning to use for your big day? Leave a comment!

The Anatomy of a Paper Rose


When my sister got married in 2013, she made her bridal bouquets out of tiny, tightly wrapped burlap and crepe paper roses. I thought they were the coolest thing ever, and that's really what inspired me to do paper flowers for my own wedding. As soon as I got engaged (ok, maybe a little before then, lets be honest) I started going a little crazy on Pinterest, pinning my favorite real and paper bouquets for inspiration. In my searching, I discovered, a blog with literally every template, printable and tutorial you can imagine (actually makes this blog post sort of pointless, but people keep asking me how I do it, so I'll keep going!) I started out using her templates and after some practice, made some tweaks and adjusted the pattern to make two sizes of roses. It used to take me 20 minutes to put together one rose; now I can do 10-12 an hour (depending on how intense the episode of SVU is that's playing in the background). Practice, practice, practice. I'd never have been able to incorporate this into my business making 1 rose every 20 minutes, and I certainly wouldn't have outfitted my whole wedding, all the while staying sane enough to keep my groom :).

1. Collect Your Materials

  • The petals are cut from text-weight 8 1/2 x 11 paper in whatever color I want, from Paper Source. The paper is very important. It needs to be light enough to curl beautifully, but heavy enough to be nice and sturdy once the bouquet is assembled. Paper Source also has awesome colors.
  • The bamboo skewer is found at most grocery stores, and is very inexpensive. I buy mine at the most expensive grocery store in St Louis (it's right next to our favorite butcher counter, and I just grab them while I'm waiting), and a pack of 100 is still under $3. They come in many sizes, so the length you want just depends on how you're going to use the roses. For bridal bouquets and the arrangement in this post, I used 6 inch skewers. These skewers were something I added to the whole flower making process. Most tutorials instruct you to use floral wire, but I find that not only difficult to work with, but also very flimsy in the final bouquet. My bouquets are rock solid (you'll thank me on your wedding day when you don't have to adjust wires all day!).
  • The bone folder is made from bone and polished smooth. I have three different "bone" folders -- a plastic one that came with my Martha Stewart score board which I hardly ever use, a teflon-coated one that's great for scoring my Passport wedding invitations, and this genuine bone folder I use for petal curling. The genuine bone folder is by far the best one for flower making, and you will find all kinds of other uses for it.
  • The glue gun is a standard high-heat glue gun you can buy at any craft store. I recommend high-heat (even though you need to be careful and have tough fingers) because the low heat glue dries too fast for this process.

2. Prep the Petals.


Once the petals are cut and ready to go, I curl each corner with the bone folder. I find it easiest to use the rounded end of the bone folder. Hold the inside of the petal and curl the paper away from you, like you're curling ribbon. I curl each corner so each petal makes a little triangle.


Once the petals are curled, I put together the center of the rose. Using the single petals, I apply a squiggle of hit glue and wrap them around skewer one by one, layering them on top of each other and allowing the curled edges to splay out. *Make sure you use the end of the skewer without the point!*


Now I glue the little tabs on the larger petals to themselves, creating little cones.


3. Assembly


Once the cones are put together, I finish assembling the flower. I put a small dot of glue on the bottom of the petals already on the skewer and poke the pointy end of the skewer through the center of each set of petals.

I stack them one under the next, alternating the petals so there are no gaps, until all petals are assembled.


If you want a different look (or if you want to add dimension to a bouquet of these roses) you can switch up the way you glue the tabbed petals together. By just turning the petals upside down (so the petals curl in instead of out) you get a very different looking rose:


You can choose to just alternate one layer of petals like this, or all of them. For the one shown above, the center is done with petals curled out, the next three layers are curled in, and the final layer is curled out. This is also a great place to use another color for a layer or two. Play around a little with it! What's your favorite?

For this bouquet, I used a mix of large and small roses, some curled in and some curled out, and I incorporated a second color in just a few petals. I love how it turned out!


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Two Food Lovers in Love (OUR WEDDING!)

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Anthony and I love food. We love to cook, we love to eat, and most importantly we love to sit across the table with those that we hold dear and share a meal. (Sharing a meal is different than the simple act of "eating", but that discussion is for another time). If you ask Anthony the way to his heart, he probably wouldn't say "through my stomach" because he's pretty romantic and I think I have other qualities he would list before my cooking. But, he would definitely agree that a mutual appreciation for cooking and eating good food was a huge building block of our relationship. We made pizza together on our second date! Our love for all things food has led us on many journeys together; amazing dinner dates, the perpetual hunt for new eateries, the food blog, and some memorable cooking disasters, just to name a few.

So when it came time to talk about the feel of our wedding, we both agreed immediately that we couldn't skimp on the food, and a fantastic farm-to-table caterer was a must. We eventually settled on Season to Taste, and it was one of the best vendor decisions we made! As one vendor after another started to fall into place, so did the feel and theme of the whole event. The focus would be on sharing a meal, and in general, the idea that "food is love". In keeping with the KE Events model, our stationery would start to tell that story, and then the details and decor on the day of would tie it all together.

We started things off with a postcard Save the Date that looked like a recipe for a good time!


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A great way to save money is to do a postcard -- it's $.15 less postage per card, and the envelope is another $.25 to $.50 depending on size. We sent 200 of these bad boys, so by sending a postcard, we saved $100! 

When it came time to design our invitations, I stuck with the theme, and tied in the red striped tea towels we would be using for our table settings.

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Anthony designed a beautiful website that matched all our stationery (he built the website, I created the content) and we accepted RSVPs online.


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Accepting RSVPs online is a fantastic way to use modern technology to make your wedding consumed life easier. Again, you save at least $1.00 per invitation (postage and envelope for returned RSVP cards). But more importantly, it's easier for you AND your guests. You automatically collect all your responses in one place that you can access from anywhere, and your guests can RSVP from their smart phone--no trip to the post office! We used a google form to collect ours, but many of the wedding websites out there now have online RSVPs included in their website templates. I can't recommend it enough! (If you hire KEEvents for planning and coordination, we even offer a free custom website with online RSVP as part of the package!)

When our out of town guests arrived at the hotel, we had prepared some goodie bags to welcome them. Inside was a little booklet I created with some information about the wedding and the area, complete with two maps and an explanation of what the heck a #hashtag is! (Click to see full size images)

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A Welcome goodie bag is certainly not a necessity for your wedding. It does add work, and some cost, and if your budget is tight it's an easy thing to skip. However, it's a nice thing to consider if you have a lot of guests coming in from out of town. We had over 150 people staying at the hotel, many of whom had traveled quite a distance to be with us and share in our day. My mom was a big proponent of the bags, and I wasn't about to argue. It's a nice thing to provide for your guests, but it also provides you with another way to communicate important information for your guests. Our little booklet included a personal note, the schedule for the weekend, wedding shuttle details and a tutorial on #hashtagging (for the older folks!) 

We got married at the church I grew up in, Melrose Highlands Congregational Church. The ceremony was so special to us. It included a poem written by my cousin and a song written and sung by some of my closest friends. I didn't want a boring program!

Photo credit: Nikki Cole Photography


The reception was held at Soldiers and Sailors Memorial Hall in Melrose, MA, which is an old utilitarian theater and event space that houses the Melrose Symphony Orchestra and Melrose Youth Ballet, along with many community events and a few weddings per year. The stage is where I performed in The Nutcracker for 8 Years as a child, it's right around the corner from my childhood home, and right in the center of my hometown. I personally didn't know anyone who had hosted a wedding there, and there were almost no photos online of the space set up for a wedding, so I was starting from scratch with decor ideas.

We went with long tables because I love the look, but also because I think they're better for conversation than the more traditional rounds. We did a family style dinner, and we wanted our guests to feel at home.

Photo credit: Nikki Cole Photography

Photo Credit: @clairemary on Instagram

Each table was covered with white linen and a layered  paper runner and decorated with simple paper roses in mis-matched jars and mason jars with fresh Maine winter berry. The bridesmaid bouquets were lined up down the length of the head table. The simple look worked to blend the rustic, farm-to-table meal with the grand, indoor, utilitarian space.


Photo credit: Nikki Cole Photography

We weren't allowed to light real candles in the space, so my mom rigged up some stringed cafe lights to bring a cozy feel to the tables without any open flame.


To fill the old theater boxes at the back of the hall, I hand painted large banners that coordinated with the logo I had designed. Each was 4 feet wide by 6 feet tall:


The cocktail hour was held in a room off the main hall, and was pretty much filled to capacity with our family and friends. We made up a signature cocktail, The Crimson Camel; a twist on a Moscow Mule that represented our two Alma Maters (the Harvard Crimson and the Connecticut College Camels)



For our favors, we bought spice jars from World Market and filled them with our Rotio spice blend for our guests to use in their own kitchens. I designed tags for the front that served as place cards, and a small hang tag with recipe suggestions. Anthony's Dad built us a giant "spice rack" to display them, and I wrote on the kraft table runner, "Spice a dish with love and it pleases every palate" along with a little map of the tables.



table map

Each table was named after one of our favorite restaurants. Anthony built a miniature sandwich board for each table, and I created a "chalkboard" design for each one that told a little story of why each spot was important to us.

Photo credit: Nikki Cole Photography

The menus and table settings were meant to mimic the trend in some of our favorite restaurants - a clipboard style card holding a simple utilitarian menu, tucked into a tea towel.


In keeping with the theme (and taking into consideration that we'd want it displayed proudly in the future), our "guestbook" was a collection of bamboo cutting boards.

Photo credit: Nikki Cole Photography

There were a couple other pieces that didn't get photographed -- an adorable Rehearsal Dinner invitation with an embossed silverware emblem and checkered envelope liner, and Head Table placecards for our bridal party. Only now, after writing this post and seeing all these photos collected in one place, am I coming to terms without how much work I did on my own wedding! Holy moly! And this doesn't even include the flowers!

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If you don't work in this industry, I would strongly recommend NOT taking on this many DIY projects for your big day. (Hire an expert like me!) Because I do this for a living, I was able to tackle it all myself, and was very prepared with a timeline that started 11 months out and left me two weeks before my wedding to catch my breath and take it all in. I recommend taking on 2-3 major projects max, and I would also suggest choosing projects you can tackle well before your wedding date. The other tip I have for getting DIY projects done on time is to ask for RSVPs extra early. Our RSVP date was a full 2 months before our wedding. You won't have your final count for Welcome Bags, Favors, Placecards, Menus and Programs until you have your RSVPs back, and if you have a bigger wedding (ours could have swung 100 people in either direction!) you'll want some breathing room.